Is it a bird, is it a plane, no its AJ riding in a rickety sardines tin. Today the western monkeys, Haidi, Olivia, Rachel and Myself decided to sit on a coach for 26 hours and travel the equivalent distance from Lands-End (Cornwall, uk) to John o'Groats (Scotland) and twice over.. all to climb a measly mountain. Sounds like a plan right? The coach broke down twice and was truly like a rickety sardine tin, smells included, and believe me it was not the best nights sleep I've ever had. One hour into our journey from Koh Phangan and we began to consider that this was in fact, a rash decision (literally). But it soon became apparent that regardless of the D.V.T it was all worth it!
We arrived in Chang Mai early morning and were transported straight to 'Nice Place 2's guest house'. It's ironic it was called a 'nice place' considering that pulling up to our hotel down a dingy back alley in what looked like the ghetto, was not so nice. However appearances aren't always as they seem and it was in fact the people that were nice, the owner 'Big Tony', (he was actually rather small) greeted us with open arms, was very funny but was strangely topless at all times. Blocking out all of the nakedness, it's big sell is the backpacker room prices which make it an attractive extra that few other guest houses match. The location was spot on, yards away from a bicycle rental shop so we took this opportunity by its handle bars and set off on a mini voyage across the city in search of the great and grand temples. We soon found that four girls riding bikes in a foreign country is a bit similar to renting cars abroad - tricky very tricky.
Not before long we ended up on a motor way, howling with laughter, lost in translation and hopelessly looking for an exit - they are not like our motorways, at all, we had to ride for 30 minutes before we saw a turn off, and even then it was a dash for your life getting through all of the cars in rush hour traffic. 'Total gridlock'.
If you do go to Chang Mai, you have to rent push bikes its hilarious and cost effective at only 120 baht which is £2 for the day and for anyone else not riding via the motorway, would be an easy and memorable way to get around with picturesque views not to mention the lack of drink biking restrictions but that's at your own peril. but my advice would be to plan your route in advance and wear a helmet just in case and if you really want to make a stand out like a sore thumb throw on a florescent jacket. Unfortunately most of the temples were closed, but the ones we did visit were breathtaking, the time, effort and craftsmanship that have gone into constructing them was beautiful. Luckily the guest house had given us a heads up about custom. 1. To cover the legs and arms. and 2. No shoes inside and 3.respecting the tranquil nature of Buddhist monks inside the temples, although this was hard to achieve on first temple arrival when we soon realised the breaks on the bikes didn't quite cut the mustard, squealing like a bunch of kittens being strangled whilst crashing into a wall can never go un-noticed. So we managed to cock that one up!
With our mental motorway dice with death over, it was time to put the partying aside, and get an early night for an early start.
5am we wake, we eat and we bump into some people from Uni in Leeds inside the lobby of the guest house. This is what I love about travelling, you never know who your going to meet or re-meet next, and luckily for us we were all booked onto the same trek. After an hour bus journey crammed into yet another tin can that you couldn't swing a cat in, we arrive at a market. This is pretty standard going on tours you take, its guaranteed that you'll be taken to somewhere before you embark on your journey so that you can spend some more cash and purchase local produce. Although, I bought Xmas socks, and skull & cross bone shorts, so not traditionally Thai, but usually they urge to to buy water bottles or anoraks in case you get poured down on during the trek, which we most definitely did, its a good job I bought a mac then isn't it!
Finally we arrive at our destination in Pai, the middle of nowhere. We felt like fish in a fish bowl, as the local villagers on looked and before we have chance to put our rucksacks down we were pounced on by a group of the most persuasive Thai children tying handmade bracelets on our wrists and asking for money. Even though it was quite awkward for those who really weren't prepared to hand over a buck, you can't not when the kids are that cute, so cute in fact that I ended up buying 10..
The rain was pouring, we were slipping all over the show but morale was high and so we began the trek. Half way into it, just as we thought we'd got through the worst of it, our tour guide dropped the 'Mama hill' bomb on us. They call it the Mama hill, because when people see it, they say 'oh mama' and oh mama we did. Through the tree's we saw a haven tucked away with falling water crashing down, rumbling on the rocks, at this point we had a huge burst of energy. Our clothes were already wet through so we plunged right in and frolicked in the waters staring at the back drop of lush greenery. I'm not going to lie, it was hard and you mentally climb over mountains of your own, on numerous occasions we wanted to throw in the towel but after all of the obstacles the juice was worth the squeeze.
Just across the way was our digs for the night, a hut on a stoop situated on top of a wild hog pen. You have to see it to believe it. All 15 people in the group walked into the hut, and literally picked a spot on the floor to sleep on. Soon after we gathered round a large table alfresco and were cooked a traditional meal by an entire family who lived and breathed the Thai jungle, a true Thai tribe. It felt amazing to be welcomed in to the family, and all 15 of us just sat around candle light until the early hours of the morning talking, and singing along to the guitar, but unfortunately we didn't sing cum-bi-yah ( thank god) .
Although it was another terrible way to sleep, just the feeling of doing some thing different, put a spring in my step. In the morning we did a bit more walking and made way for our bamboo rafting extravaganza, this is no ordinary rafting. Imagine four long bamboo canes that looked like what can only be described as a didgeridoo, tied together by pieces of string and a bamboo ore to push yourselves along with. Most people get a guide to stand on the raft with, but not for us independent ladies, again four girls against the murky mysterious waters of one very dirty river, full of unidentified creatures lurking around the bottom of it.
Experiences like this are so hard to explain when your not taking part in it, but this is something I will remember for the rest of my life. With a great chance that we'd fall in, we felt compelled to do the river raft in only our bikinis, as soon as we set off, we realised that no one was behind us. We had prematurely set off down a fast streaming river with no idea how to manoeuvre ourselves in the direction we intended to go in. Within the first five minutes we had a man overboard, and its extremely hard to focus on helping someone get back on the raft when your laughing so hard that you forget to breathe.
This was not the only time passengers fell in, and because of the constant lack of attention I found myself being knocked off by a large tree that I definitely did not see. The entire ride felt like a I was in a film, performing ridiculous and larger than life mishaps. At one point my leg got stuck between two bamboo canes, this was highly painful but with all the cackling it was hard to notice, that was until I spotted insects which looked like leeches crawling up my arms, and so I shrieked like a baby and slapped my arms until they were red raw and the insects were gone. ( Please note: no insects were harmed in the making of this blog)
I think its safe to say that the whole trip was worth every penny, I actually think I developed a two pack from all of the laughing and exercise ( which soon disappeared once back in civilisation and the tempting Thai food that surrounded us). Overall the trip and accommodation cost nothing more than £30, which is an absolute bargain. I highly recommend heading north to Chang Mai, as there's only so many beach parties and debauchery you can conduct before you begin to feel un-cultured. And its if Thailand's nature your 'pine'-ing for, trekking in Chang Mai is an option you have to consider. Most fun-loving travellers could presume this kind of excursion to being more educational but I think it was on par with all of our partying, and possibly one of the funniest experiences of my life.
